NOW what?!?!

I stand firm in my belief that October is a month in which bad things just happen. good things can happen, but rarely do (ie: Jacob was created october 2005, I do know the exact date but chose not to disclose it)

there is a long list of crappy Octobers in my head but for now I'll stick with the current one :)

My grandmother died. big BIG one since we were very close. :( I miss her soooo much. especially on game days (GO HUSKERS!!!!!) I just keep thinking that she'd be watching the game and yelling at the tv about what idiots they are. I think I may be overcompensating by buying everything husker I can find. I saw a baby with a N binkie today! I must have one for both of my boys now...

this whole week has just been awful. we have had our lowest prices of the season sale so of course we were crazy busy the whole week. plus i've been working longer days (7-8hrs) compared with what I have been working (6-6.5hrs). they have been pushing the extended warranties so of course they've been telling us not to let the customer just say no but to explain explain explain and try to convince them to buy it. but at the same time we are supposed to get everyone through as fast as possible!! It gives me a huge headache whenever I see the stupid prompt...half the time i don't say anything about it. and I just found out the other day they are tying our raises to the warranty sales. we get a 50 cent/hr raise if we sell a warranty every hour. I haven't even managed to sell a warranty every DAY much less every HOUR!! which sucks because I do need a raise. badly.

My back is going out. I'm not sure why but I have a few guesses...its the worst in the morning and best around 2-4pm. I need to call on monday and make an appt with a chiro.

Jacob and Caleb are both teething. I feel so badly for both of them. they are obviously uncomfortable/in pain. and I feel bad for me b/cuz Jacob when he's in pain wants to nurse and since its his mouth that hurts and counterpressure makes it feel better...logically i understand it but physically i'd rather he find something else to chomp on!

this isn't bad at first but it gets bad...warning...my stbx is all about drama....

Roland got pulled over last friday or saturday (can't remember) for speeding and was summarily carted off to jail. he called me from the sherrifs car and wanted me to call xy and z to try to get him bail money. I told him to suck it up and sit it out. I was broke and had too much to worry about to mess with cleaning up his messes. He said okay and that he'd call his dad and not to worry about it he'd call me when he got out. fine and dandy. At work on monday (or maybe tuesday?) I got a voicemail from someone I never met in regards to my *husband* and I should call this man back! not likely! last night was the worst...his uncle Ron calls me and tells me that he's gonna bail R out but he needs someone to sit down there until he gets out b/cuz otherwise he has no way home. fine whatever. I'm nice and even though he's treated me and my sons like crap he's still a human being and their father blah blah blah. so I talk Jill into picking him up. we stopped at the store first and when we got there his dad was sitting across the street with R in the passengers seat. To say I was mad was an understatement. I was LIVID. it was 11pm...and I had to be to work at 9am and Jacob wakes up at least 2-3x a night. Plus i'd already taken my contacts out and was pretty much blind. I informed him to tell his family a.) that we are getting a divorce and that I dont consider him my husband. legally yes...in my heart? no way. and b.) never to call me for anything. for any reason. whatsoever.

Today when she picked me up Jill told me that Roland wrote me a letter in jail and it came in the mail today. I was a bit nervous (its one thing to think he wants me back and quite another to be faced with proof) but it was nothing.he was just complaining. like always. he did end by saying "love you three" (ha!) and added a ps (we need to talk) but oh well. I have told him that that's it. I'm not going to play his games anymore and mostly I don't want to. I told him in january I want boring and predictible and he says that he wants the same thing but he's lying. he wants drama.

and the daycare wants Jacob's immunization record. which of course does not exsist.